Chapter One: Making Decisions, or Embracing the Bad

After writing zero words last night in favor of watching two episodes of 30 Rock that I've already seen and napping in an ironically-purchased Snuggie, I started the novel in earnest this morning when I got to work.  I'm about half a page in, describing the church my family used to attend, and trying to squeeze in background information so imaginary readers can get to know the protagonist. 

What is immediately evident is that I have some decisions to make.  Before I even began writing, I went ahead and subconsciously decided that this novel was going to be written in third-person, because it just came out that way.  And the narrator is omniscient, meaning he/she knows what the protagonist is thinking and goes ahead and blabs about it.  There's this other option that I'd like to explore -- it's called free indirect discourse, where the narrator's thoughts and the characters' thoughts are almost indistinguishable.  I've always liked encountering that kind of narration in fiction.  Looks like my Narrative Theory class is coming in handy after all.  WTG, Fred Whiting!

I'm beginning the novel with the protagonist and her best guy friend at a wedding, since in the South this event is the single most important thing in a 20-something's life.  This couple is getting married right out of college, because that's what they're supposed to do, and Allie questions whether they've made the right decision.  (Yes, Allie is the protagonist's name.  Allie Weaver.  I was going to avoid revealing that, but it would get exceedingly difficult to continue calling her "the protagonist").  She's on the cusp of going off to grad school (yes, there are autobiographical elements in here), because she thinks she wants to pursue a career in academia.  She's obviously going to get very drunk at this wedding reception.  Things will happen.

Besides making decisions about the novel itself, I'm making decisions about the types of things I'm going to let influence it.  There is SO MUCH STUFF ON THE INTERNET about how to write a novel.  It's really hilarious and awesome.  Since I admit to being a total amateur with no real intention of making this book very good, I've decided I'm going to embrace the bad.  I'm going to follow almost no advice from reliable sources or people I admire -- I'm going to use Google to write this bitch.  Secretgeek.net?  Yes, please!  Fill me with your nonsense! Publishing is for Schmucks, you say?!  Tell me more!  I'm FASCINATED.

Maybe I’ll just write the whole thing in Comic Sans.

Possibly more to come later -- it's only 10:49 AM and I have nothing to do today but use a glue stick to seal up 200 postcard envelopes and put them in the mail.